Alle kleuren van de regenboog

Hey hey Helens!

'Tis Friday morn. I am up bright and early thanks to the consumption of one too many shandies last night. Which always seems to make one wake up earlier (Salut Fred!)

So here I sit, farting really rather despicably. I am listening to Belgium's favourite Dutch-language girl group, K3. They are like the best selling act for the under-5s. When I lived in Brussels with Pauline and chum, I tried to learn Dutch thanks to K3. It wasn't the most rip-roaringly successful jaunt, but I did learn many useful words. Like 'vis' for 'fish' for example.

The song 'Alle kleuren' was arguably K3's finest hour. The chorus goes (my translation, sorry for any uber-clangers):
From Africa to America
From the Himalayas to the Wild West
From Africa to America
Yes things are so much nicer when we are together
Hand in hand, eye to eye
All the colours of the rainbow! (alle kleuren van de regenboog)

It really reminds me of a fun and Europe-tastic time in my life! Pauline was given the cd as a sort of joke, but the guy who gave it to him didn't realise that bad pop for the rest of the world = scintillatingly good pop for the Pauline and the Finda. Pauline's poor boyfriend, needless to say, didn't love K3. And he probably still doesn't love them now. I am going to post a photo.

They are called K3, by the way, because one is called Karen, one Kristell and one Katrin. Creativity all over, no?

Oh God I can't stop listening to it!!!

Also, my ex used to hate K3. Like, what was I DOING with that loser?! I once had K3 as wallpaper on my PC. And he complained bitterly til I took them off. Had I known he was using my PC to cheat on me with a hairdresser, I might have had some rather bitter complaining of my own to do.

My favourite pen (which is on refill no. 3, fact fans) is yes, a K3 pen. And I have door 'do not disturb' labels that say 'Jongens NEJ!' or similar (Boys NO!) on them. K3 I'm so with you.

I am trying to work out the dynamics of online 'friendships'. I can't work them out. And when I say 'friendships', you get me. It is so very head-throbtastically confusing. Pauline is advising me to walk away from that shop, or at least to get a money-back guarantee. Online shenanigans - I remain unconvinced. It does help fill up your time though...

OK so you want to know all sorts of juicy gossip then? Well so do I, that's why I subscribe to Popbitch. Oh you mean MY life? Well, I am loving living here in lovely Nacka (ie it is not "Nacka'd"!! Boom boom!). Ulla and her sons are so nice. And so is their immaculately preened dog. Part of me would like to say I miss Anissa, but I just don't! She was a total advantage-taker. And farts that would kill Ian Paisley that you blame on your unborn child. God help him when he eventually gets out - "It's your fault that mummy lost her figure and became a crackhead".

I have been getting a bit better at Swedish. I went for an assessment at the Folkuniversitetet (adult education centre) yesterday, and I sailed through Test 1. I fell flat on my face at Test 2 though. But I am level B1, which is q good apparently. I wish I had the balls to actually open my mouth though (I know that sounds a bit mad, but I get totally tongue-tied...)

Then I went on to CHOIR! I am so hearting that. Esp going to bars and getting drunk with poovetry after. We did some singing then off to the bar with my new best friend Nils, who is lovely and goes out with lovely Danne. So I met an ENGLISHMAN in the choir called Roger (hello!) and I thought he was like, 23, and lo and behold, he is thirty fucquing seven! So that's what daily semen facials do to a boy!

We had fun, and cracked British jokes. I was very loud. The Swedes look at you in a half-frightened half-disdainful way if you are too loud. And one too many ales tends to pump up my volume. It was great though. And I got the bus home. The bus is super because it talks, so I know when to get off (it would be a bit more hectic otherwise, in the dark, Sweden looks like anywhere else!) Sooz, I also explained to the throng how I helped you remember the gender of 'candle' in French. Just to prove a point, obviously, and not to attract attention or be fawned over, you understand...

I met some lovely men. Like, not boys, jaha? Men. Proper ones.

So I may have to go and touch myself inappropriately now.

Bye then :) Hope youse are all well likesay.

Hej hej!